Vodka drinkers
I hate it when I buy a bottle of whisky and it comes in a decorative cardboard tube, from which I derive no utility and which only takes up space which could be occupied by perfectly good air. What do the manufacturers think I’m thinking? That a cardboard tube with a whisky brand all over it will come in handy as what, a vase to show off my hydrangeas? Some kind of Blue-Peter megaphone? Presumably there are a lot of imbeciles out there buying whisky because they get a free cardboard tube which they can bellow down to amplify their cretinous opinions. If any of you are reading this, here’s a proposition: I’ll save you the trouble of drinking your whisky with cranberry juice or red bull or whatever wank-headed mixer is currently in vogue in exchange for a regular supply of the rolled-up cardboard you crave. Please note that the delivery of said cardboard, in accordance with ancient Scottish Mel Gibson Och Aye High Road Bonnie Lassie Over The Ocean tradition, may involve beating around the head. But why whisky? You don’t see it with vodka. Vodka drinkers are all too busy drooling over the display.
This entry was posted on Saturday, April 22nd, 2006 at 10:01 PM and filed under New stuff. Trackbacks are closed.
I hate those tubes too. Not only because they are useless and do nothing to enhance the whisky drinking experience (whisky drinking, of course, without mixers), but because I suffer from hording disease. The tube is just so well made and could be painted or something to become part of an art piece, one day, couldn’t it?
Posted on 22-Apr-06 at 11:58 pm | PermalinkWhen I was doing GCSE art I used to store my paintbrushes in a Glenmorangie cardboard tube, mainly for the effect of raising eyebrows as I carried it around school. Other than this, however, I agree with you. No use whatsoever, and just one more obstacle to actually opening the damn bottle.
Posted on 23-Apr-06 at 2:20 am | PermalinkAgreed, ladies. I think there’s a place for art supplies and paintbrush holders and that place is not encasing a bottle of whisky. Call me a staid traditionalist but I prefer to purchasse my art supplies and my paintbrush holders independently of my Scotch.
Posted on 23-Apr-06 at 6:49 am | PermalinkI thought they stopped your whiskey getting ger-fucked by that nasty UV light stuff.
Posted on 23-Apr-06 at 12:04 pm | PermalinkOh. Well, fair enough then.
Posted on 23-Apr-06 at 1:26 pm | PermalinkYou mean you leave it hanging around for long enough to see the light of day?
Weirdo.
Posted on 25-Apr-06 at 2:25 am | Permalink